Wednesday, June 11, 2014

What To Do for a Husband/Father Who Doesn't Want Father's Day

Yes, it's true.

Every year, my husband says the same thing. I think the children and I have it memorized.

"Father's Day is a Hallmark holiday, made up so that people will buy expensive cards."

"Don't spend money on a card."

"I don't need anything. Don't buy me anything."

I admire this attitude, quite frankly. My husband, plain and simple, doesn't want a day to be about him. For him, being a husband and father is its own reward. He does what he does because he should and because God has called him and because he loves his family, not for any kind of accolade.

Plus, my husband is quite frugal. He looks in his closet and realizes we don't need to spend money on more clothes. He looks at the cards and realizes that that impersonal piece of printed cardstock might sit on the countertop for a few days until it becomes clutter and then either thrown away or put in a box where it will stay until our children have to clean it out after we're in our graves. (Please don't think I'm poking at my husband's thriftiness. It's his frugality that has taken us on some fantastic vacations and is allowing us to build a home.) He definitely doesn’t want me to spend a bunch of money on an electronic toy.

But after all that, the children and I still want to do something special, something that shows how much we appreciate and love him. His attitude, in fact, spurs us on to recognize him.

So, what to do?

Pray. Isn't that the best gift anyway, interceding for him with the Heavenly Father?

Make a card. We get out a file folder, craft supplies, pretty papers, colored pencils, and let the children's creativity loose.

Tell him we appreciate him and say, "Happy Father's Day." We should say uplifting and encouraging things to our husbands all the time, but let's be honest. It's easy to let that get shoved aside in the hurry-scurry of the mundane. On Father's Day, I do some extra building-up. J

Fix his favorite meal, even if it's something I don't like. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach, right? J

Give him a relaxing day. Let him sit and read or choose the evening video or take a nap.

Buy him something anyway, but I make sure it really is something he needs or I keep it small. Honestly, Father’s Day is a time when I can buy him something he truly does need but won’t buy for himself. J One year, my husband needed a watch. It was a desperate, hard-to-function-at-work, irritating-others-to-ask-what-time-it-is NEED for a watch. I kept it as inexpensive as I could while still buying something that would last and look nice. This year, the children and I bought something on impulse as we walked through WalMart. It cost $5, and it will be both fun and useful. My apologies, but I can't share it here because my husband reads my blog. J

Prayers for a wonderful Father’s Day!

What are your thoughts on Father’s Day? What do you get for your husband or father for Father’s Day?

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  1. I hear the same thing each year, too. We tend to write letters to each other on special occasions. One thing he does use is tire shine and each year one of us will gift that to him. He's always so happy. I love a man who gets joy out of the little gifts, too.

  2. My mom is the same way! Every year she says to not buy her anything. My sister and her husband do a project for her instead of buying her something - taking out shrubs, thatching the yard, etc. I try to go practical because she doesn't need anymore stuff. In years past, I bought her flowers for our outside pots and this year I bought her pepper spray because she's been walking outside quite a bit. :)

  3. We always celebrate Fathers Day with a cookout and all the kids and grandkids are with us.
    and, by the can add on that card ya'll make him that HE IS A HUNK !! :)
    xo bj

  4. I think it's pretty rare that it's completely true that a husband or dad doesn't need anything--we're being ultra practical right now and not splurging but I bought my man a package of socks for his upcoming birthday...because all his socks have holes in them, I figured it's about time! Practical gifts are great--with many men, even food--a meal that they especially love, is a good way to show them how appreciated they are without spending extra money!

  5. I loved this post and getting to know your husband a bit.


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