Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Question: Do You Tell Your Husband You Bought . . . ?

You are enjoying a girls’ day out with your BFF. After a stop at Starbucks, you end up at the mall. 
At your favorite store, you find an amazing shirt, just right to wear alone for the warm temperatures of summer or to layer for the cooler temperatures of winter. It is so versatile and attractive you don’t know how you’ve gotten along without it. Even better, it’s marked thirty percent off, and you find your size in five glorious colors. But that little voice inside reminds you that money is a little tight as you and your husband are trying to save some extra each month and he wants to be consulted on big purchases. You –

a.       Buy one each – after all, a few tee-shirts don’t qualify as a big purchase – and confess to your husband at home, assuaging your guilt with chocolate.

b.      Don’t buy any. You respect your husband and don’t want to risk upsetting him.

c.       Call him to ask what he thinks. Then, when you think he is going to say no, you claim static and cut the connection. You buy the shirts and feign innocence at home.

d.      Buy one each and a few extra, then pay the credit card bill in secret the next month. His ignorance is your bliss.

What’s your answer? Or is there another option?


Growing Home

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  1. I always call my husband first on anything I buy. I know most think that is crazy, but he is the one making the money. I think God wants us to be careful how we do things. If he says yes fine and if he says no fine. We live without the things we wanted already right?

    1. Michelle, I LOVE your last comment: We already live without the things we wanted. You are so right, and I have that thought race through my mind sometimes when I am shopping and want something that isn't a need. I wonder, would I miss it if I hadn't come shopping today and seen it? Excellent comment. Thanks.

  2. I'm still trying to picture the "girl's day out" and "ending up at Starbucks" part! Oh, does that ever sound like fun! :-)
    My husband and I are completely open when it comes to spending. If we aren't shopping together, I show him my purchases before I ever take the tags off. Because it's so rare that I can find modest clothing that fits (where do they come up with plus styles anyway!), he wants me to buy it when I can. He would be the one to say, "Buy one in every color." I would be the one to choose one or two and probably take one or both of them back...lol!
    So, I would definitely say there are other options. And I'm also amazed at how many people run their households like two seperate businesses. It's no wonder there is so much miscommunication and divorce.

  3. Stephanie -- I've never had that situation before either -- the girls day out with Starbucks and shopping! I've known women in each of the four situations, and it raises an interesting question of how to handle purchases with your husband and what role submission plays. I agree with you completely on the difficulty in finding modest clothing, and my experience has been similar to yours -- if I find something appropriate, my husband wants me to buy it. Thanks!

  4. I am the one who handles all the finances in our family because I am better at it than my husband, so I would have a good idea of how much money I could spend. Unless the shirt costs hundreds of dollars I wouldn't consider it a big purchase. But if we couldn't afford it, then I wouldn't buy it. Not only because he would be upset, but because it wouldn't be a wise choice.

    1. Excellent thoughts, Anne. If you can't afford it, don't buy it. It's so simple, yet seemingly so hard to follow for so many. Thanks for your comments today.

  5. Yes, I handle the finances so I wouldn't be buying anyway. If hubbie was handling the finances and I knew we were trying to save, I would not buy. I would not ever call hubbie about it because he would say buy it, but them all!! LOL He likes it when I give in and finally spend money on myself.


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